A certain amount of guilt may be inevitable. Perhaps a more devoted son would have continued to do everything in his power to support his doddering parents, maybe even enjoying the self-imposed martyrdom, but I am not that son. Indeed, I couched my decision in terms of their safety, their happiness and well-being, and pointed out that by hiring professionals to take care of life's mundane details, we would now be free to help them enjoy life more by taking them out to lunch or a movie, or just visiting to chat and play a game. I believe those benefits will be, at least for the short term, real.
The agreement has been signed; a professional care agency will be sending someone out twice a week to take care of basic household chores, including cooking some meals, running errands and shopping. The total cost may run $200 per week, which, while more than they would like to spend, is completely affordable, and far less than the $600 per week a live-in caregiver would cost (also affordable, in my opinion, and a bargain at that.) But this is a good beginning, and after three years of my ongoing commitment, a welcome relief.
At the same time, what will my new role be? No longer a caregiver in any real sense, and no reason to be angry. My updated status begs the question as to whether this blog is even necessary. I might still have the occasional opportunity to take my dad to the barber, or pick something up from the store; indeed, packing the parents into a car and driving them to lunch may, in time, feel onerous. But the strict definition of caregiver will no longer apply.
It remains to be seen how much more I will want to write about the inevitable decline and fall of my aging parents, myself and indeed, of all people. It is a fact of life that hardly bears reflection. Yet there may be glimmers of insight, or humorous observations that I feel might be worth reporting. As I said, it all remains to be seen. Until then, enjoy your summer, as I intend to enjoy mine.
