The most tedious argument has a longer shelf life than the ideal reconciliation. We forgive, but we don’t forget; raw feelings can easily be reignited, while the memory of sheepish—even sincere—words of apology stokes anew the fire of resentment.
But being good citizens and realizing that we need to get along, Jeannie and I followed up our recent outburst with a rational discussion, each acknowledging the other’s feelings and apologizing (more or less) for the harsh words. We even agreed on the point that my father and I deserve some “father/son” time together, doing whatever we choose.
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| Happy times |
To top it off, she even said she’d like to treat us to lunch one of these days, an idea I gratefully acknowledged while trying not to think that my accusation of her selfishness is likely what prompted the offer.
Again, as we negotiated the usual, tedious shopping trip I noticed Jeannie’s increasing frailty, her failing body and mind. Simultaneously sympathetic and annoyed, I realized it will only be another year or so before even these basic errands will be past her ability.
I also question my own abilities: will I be able to stand this until my care-giving services are no longer required? How much more patience and understanding will I have to cultivate?
Happy 4th to everyone—and may we all appreciate our independence as long as we have it.
